The Addiction We Do Talk About

 

Today, I am writing about a topic that might make some uncomfortable, but I think it important to consider:   pornography.   If you do not want to read this, feel free to stop now.    If you choose to continue reading,   I believe I have something important for some people to hear.     As some of you know that might be reading this,   I am not only an ordained pastor but also a licensed clinical mental health counselor in NC and a licensed professional counselor in SC.    While I am not serving as pastor at a church at this time,   I continue to serve via virtual counseling.    In the last few years,   I have seen a number of persons who were struggling with an addiction to pornography.    There are several things these persons have in common.     First, they are all male ranging in age from their early 20’s to their late 60’s.     Secondly,   they all confess to be Christians.   Most of these men are heavily involved in their church.    I certainly did not seek out to counsel persons about pornography, but God is giving me that opportunity. 

I remember many years ago going to a home to visit a home.   As I knocked on the door,   I could hear some noise inside.   Despite the knocks,  no one came.    At a later time,  I saw the occupant of that home.      The man acknowledged that he knew that I stopped by, but he did not answer the door because he was looking at a movie laced with pornography on his television.     I share that anecdote to illustrate that pornography is easily accessible in the world we live in today.  Some of you perhaps remember a time when pornography was something that one encountered at a x-rated movie theatre or via a magazine that came to your home in a manila envelope or you skimmed at a local store.   Now, pornography can be encountered on social media, web sites, and the like with ease on a smart phone or other devices.    Of course,   there are many things on television via movies, ads, and television shows that certainly have sexual content. 

There are many people that think that pornography is harmless since it is something that can be easily done in the privacy or comfort of their own home.      One of my clients once thought that, but now sees things differently as he seeks to break free from porn.    The reason why I am writing this blog post on what some perhaps find an uncomfortable topic is this:   porn can and does hurt others.     Pornography can and does harm relationships.    I have encountered clients that stated that their marriage or relationship was troubled since their wife or girlfriend found out they were looking at pornography.    I have worked with clients whose marriage ended in divorce principally because of their pornography addiction.  I also have worked with clients that lost their jobs because their employer discovered them viewing pornography in their workplace.   

If pornography is a part of your life,  I earnestly encourage you to get help and to quit fooling yourself that it is harming no one.   Please get help.    I do not think that God wants pornography to be a part of your life.   Perhaps you know someone important in your life who is struggling with pornography.      Feel free to reach out to me and I will be happy to offer a few things that might help you.    Thanks for reading.    God bless.-  Pastor Randy Wall

 

PRAYER --  O God,  I pray for all those who are struggling today with addictions including those who struggle with pornography.   Grant them a willingness to find strength and a new direction in you;  through Christ our Lord.    Amen. 

We Know Not When

 

“I never saw it coming.”     I suspect that you have said that phrase before or heard it said before.  You never saw it coming that a friend died that day… or that you lost your job or the company was closing… or some other experience that was sudden and shocking.  There are many things in life that are predictable-   that a couple we know that has been dating or been together for years finally decides to get married…. or that in a few weeks the trees and bushes will begin to bud or flower.    We expect those things.    But then again, there come those things in life that we do know are coming.   

There are some global events that folks did not see coming.   My Dad would tell the story about that Sunday afternoon when he and his parents heard the news about the Japanese attack at Pearl Harbor.    My Dad was still a boy in those days, and even his adult parents did not see that coming.     I still remember that Tuesday morning when I heard the news about planes flying into the twin towers of the World Trade Center in New York City and a plane doing the same at the Pentagon in suburban Washington DC.   I did not see it coming, nor did any of the people in those buildings on that September day.   

There are some things in our faith as Christians we will not see coming.    That is a part of what Jesus gets at in the words of Matthew 24: 36-37 where we read:  

³⁶ “No one knows when that day and hour will come^[a]—neither the heavenly angels nor the Son,^[b] but only the Father, ³⁷ because just as it was in Noah’s time, so it will be when the Son of Man comes. 

We know that God came.    Why, God came in a form that took all humanity by surprise-  as a tiny baby born to a teenage peasant girl named Mary.      We spent days celebrate that coming just weeks ago.     We also know that God will come again.    Generations of Christians facing trial and trouble have found solace in that thought and hope.    The apostle Paul even thought that Christ would come again during his lifetime.    But we do not know when though through the years some folks have claimed they had a special knowledge about that.

There are some things in life we do know when.   When a baby is born through natural means,  we do not when that time will be.   On this winter February day,  we know not  when it will be a snow day or a sunny day.    We do not know.  So, we live like soldiers waiting for their orders to come down.    We work for the Master, and we stand ready for the hour when Christ will come again or call us home to heaven.   Come, Lord Jesus!   Have a good day.-   Pastor Randy Wall

PRAYER --  O God,  who has come and is coming:   we wait with expectation for the day you shall return and take us home.   Help us live each day with hope in you and in eagerness to serve you;  through Christ our Lord.    Amen. 

Don't Forget the Baby!

 

January is a time of year when people spend time putting things away!    A few weeks ago,  those Christmas decorations were front and center in our homes and our hearts.   Yet, now those Christmas decorations are going back to the places where we put them for the other days and weeks of the year.   A few weeks ago,  Christmas gifts were on our minds.   First, we were buying the gifts followed by wrapping the gifts and putting them under our tree.   Finally, there came that time when we gave gift or opened our gifts.   Unless we chose to send them back, now we are putting those gifts into the newfound place they have in our homes or in our lives.  

 There is one thing that I hope you will not put away, and that is Jesus.   I remember back in the 1970’s when friends of mine had their first child.   That little boy  was certainly wanted by his parents and lavished with attention.     A few weeks after that,   these new parents were on their way to church or some other familiar destination.    After they were a couple of miles down the road, they realized to their horror they had forgotten something really important-  THEIR NEWBORN SON!    

 As you advance into the new days and weeks of this new year,  take Jesus with you!    Do not put the child/ King away like you do the Christmas decorations that will remain dormant and hidden for the next 10 to 11 months.     Do not put Jesus in your closet like you do new dress pants or a new sweater.    Keep Jesus front and center.  Keep him close, even in your own heart!     Let Him have a prominent place not just in your home but in your life. 

 There are folks who seek to have Christmas without Jesus.    I am not sure how they do it, but they try.     There are some folks who trot out Jesus at Christmas to display when they have not given him much attention since last Christmas.    The Lord Jesus does not want to be someone who comes to mind for only a few weeks every year.  No, he wants to be a part of your world and in your life 365 days a year.   

Thanks for reading.    I hope that this new year is your best year yet!   Have a joy-filled week.-  Pastor Randy Wall  

PRAYER --  O God,   I celebrate in these days the good news that Christ has come and is coming.  Help me, God, to make Christ a part of my life each and every day; through the King of Kings,  Lord of Lords I pray.    Amen. 

 

 

S.D.G.

 

I love Christmas music.     One of the challenges I faced when serving as a local church pastor is that there is so much great Christmas music and it is challenging for any local church pastor and church music director to share all of it during the Sundays of December.     One of the ways that I found to share more of the good Christmas music was to incorporate a “Service of Lessons and Carols”  into some worship experience during the Advent or Christmas season.

Most every year,  my wife Ann and I will make plans to go to at least one musical experience during the days leading up to Christmas.   In 2024,  we had the experience of attending a presentation of Handel’s Messiah in downtown Charlotte.    Whether the music of the Messiah is “your cup of tea” ,  it is a beautiful piece to experience.   If you have never heard the full version of the Messiah, know that it is filled with Scripture and has three parts as follows:  the first part focuses on the prophecies of the Messiah;  the second part focuses on the passion and redemption of Christ Jesus; and the third part focuses on the resurrection of Christ Jesus. 

As I prepared to attend the Messiah last year,  I did a little study of the background of the piece of music that was written in the 1700’s.   One of the things I was reminded of is that at the end of his composition of the Messiah,  Handel  wrote three letters:  S.D.G.      Those three letters are an abbreviation for a latin phrase:  “Soli Deo Gloria” which in English means “To God alone the glory”.     

Several years ago,  I came across a copy the Westminister Catechism that had belonged to my Grandparents.      They attended the Presbyterian Church and it was used in the process of becoming a member of the church.   In that catechism, persons learn a series of questions and answers.  One of the first questions is:    “What is the chief aim of mankind?”       The answer to that question is this:    “To glorify God and enjoy Him forever.”

Whether we be a musical composer like Handel… a pastor preparing for a Christmas Eve Service… or a parent trying to maintain their sanity amid the fever-pitch stresses of  daily life  with young children,   are we living our life to give glory of God?      In these December days,  surely many of you will hear that passage of scripture that says “Glory to God in the highest” or perhaps you may sing that song whose chorus says “Gloria in Excelsis Deo.”      Glorifying God is not just a song to be sung at Christmas or a portion of scripture to read this time of year.      No,   it I a way of life that all those who bow their knee at the babe of Bethlehem are called to aspire to.     Let it be in these days and everyday.   Merry Christmas-   Pastor Randy Wall

 PRAYER --  O God,   I celebrate in these days the good news that Christ has coming and is coming.  Help me, God, to seek each and every day to give praise and glory to you, the King of Kings,  Lord of Lords.    Amen. 

Kings and Queens

 

She was the Queen.   That is what her  name tag told me as she checked me out at a local  convenience store.    One of the things I try to do as I encounter people who take my order… check me out at the store… and the like is to acknowledge them.   Most of the time, I will mention their name when I speak to them.    They are more than a server or a cashier;  they are a person.    As she told me the sum of my total purchase, I said to her:   “So, are you queen of this place?”     She replied,  “No, Queen is my real name.   When I was young, some of the kids would make fun of it and I would fight them about it.”   I told her:   “Why, that sounds like a strong name.”    She smiled as she listened to my reply and took the money for my purchase.  

As I went on my way out of the store and got in my car, I thought about royalty and queens.   I thought about the days when our children were young and our daughters would dress up like queens or princesses.   Yet, I also thought about a passage of scripture from I Peter 2: 9-10 where we read these words:

⁹ But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. ¹⁰ Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.     I Peter 2: 9-10

 For the follower of Christ Jesus, Jesus Christ is the King of Kings, Lord of Lords.   If we are followers of Christ and baptized in His name, that means that you and I are royalty too.  In other words, you and I are kings and queens, princes and princesses.    We might not have   a name like my friend “Queen”, but we have royalty in our legacy because we are a part of the body of Christ.    

If you are like me, there are times when life is hard and tough.     When life is hard and you are feeling down, remember that you are a child of the King of Kings, Lord of Lords.  You are a part of the royal family because you are in Christ and Christ is in you.   Have a blessed day!-   Pastor Randy Wall

PRAYER --  O God,   I celebrate today that royal blood goes through my veins because I am a follower of  the King of Kings, Christ Jesus.   Help me to open my heart more fully to allow Him to live in me;   through Christ our Lord.     Amen.  

The Autumn of the Year, and the Autumn of My Years

 

NOTE:    The essay below was written several months ago and was entered into the North Carolina Senior Games finals for 2025.    Enjoy.-   RW

I love this time of year!   I love Autumn and Fall.    I particularly love the month of October.     As I have said before,   October is the month when I fell in love with Jesus and fell in love with my wife, Ann.   October often brings us cool morning and warm days….the sight of fields being harvested and the feel of a frosty morning… the smell of burning leaves and of freshly cooked barbecue at a church fund-raiser.  Another thing that Autumn brings is the glorious splendor of leaves as they change to colors of red, orange, and yellow.    What a wonderful experience to drive on the Blue Ridge Parkway under a colored canopy of trees above you or to look from a mountain vista this time of year.    

I am now in the autumn of my life.     I think that is fair to say that I have more years in the past than I have in my future.      Since I am on social security and medicare now,   the government has officially declared that I am old.     I wear my age with a badge of honor as I can name you friends who have gone on to the reward God has for them that I still miss.    I sometimes ask at restaurants if they offer a senior citizen discount and am quick to accept them if they are offered.    I have less hair on my head than I used to, and it is not sandy and blond as it once was.    It is not unusual for me to hear on social media or to read in the obituary pages the names of people who are my peers.      

Despite the fact that I am in the autumn of my life,    I can also declare this:    as the autumn of the year is a beautiful time,  so the autumn of my years is also a beautiful time.    It is nice some nights to stay up late if I want to, and some mornings to sleep a little later.     It is nice to look at my bank account and see retirement monies or social security being deposited into my bank account.     It is flattering when our children or grandchildren ask me about something in the past years ago  that I seem to be able to remember when sometimes I struggle to remember what I had for dinner 3 nights ago.     It is a joy to still be healthy enough to live on my own, and to some days walk for more than an hour.     It is  a real blessing to leave home for a few days and travel to destinations a few hours away by car or a few hours away by plane and see family, friends, or this beautiful world that God has given us.     Most of all, it is a gift to me to be able to have my wife, Ann, by my side and to share these  days and experiences with her and to have children, grandchildren, and other family that we love and that love us.  

I see and hear once in a while someone making critical  or condescending remarks about senior citizens and the elderly.   I am certain I use to make them also, but now I look in the mirror and realize that person looking back at me is an elder.       And despite the critical remarks I sometimes hear,  I can say with gratitude what a blessing God gives me each day to wake up and live this life in the autumn of my years.      What a beautiful time of year is Autumn, and what a beautiful gift is the autumn of my life.    Have a joy-filled day.-  Pastor Randy Wall

Prayer-   God, thank you for the gift of life.    Help me, O God, to live each day with joy and wonder;  through Jesus Christ our Lord.    Amen.

The Loss of the Family Farm

 

See the picture below.     It is a photo of a painting that hangs in the living room of our  home.    

It is a picture of the first home where I lived after my parents brought me home  from the hospital after I was born.   The house where my parents lived at the time of my birth was actually my maternal Grandparents home.   It was located outside of my hometown of Burlington North Carolina.   In the land behind the farm was a small family farm where my grandfather farmed the land.   That land is not a farm anymore.   In my toddler years was when the interstate highway system began in the United States.    Today,  8 lanes of Interstate 85 and Interstate 40 goes through the middle of the land that was once my grandparents family farm.    Another portion of the old family farm is where a Home Depot welcomes customers today.  

I see the loss of farmland also  in the community outside of Charlotte where I currently live.    My wife and I live in a subdivision that once was part of a family farm that was once owned by a man who I had the privilege to officiate at his funeral when I served as his pastor back in the 1990’s. .   Down the road,  a local public school sits on land where cattle once grazed and roamed.   

I share these observations and truths to make a point:   farmland and family farms are disappearing across the United States.   Yahoo finance reported in 2022 that the 2020 census showed that 1.9 million acres of farmland in the United States had disappeared largely through urbanization.    The article reported that the leading states where this has been happening is in Colorado, Texas, and Oklahoma.    In 2023, the American Farmland Trust reported that in my home state of North Carolina that 55 acres of farmland is lost EACH DAY.   At this rate,   they believe that 1.2 million acres of farmland will be lost by 2040 in NC.  

Perhaps some of you are wondering why this loss of farmland or family farms should concern you.   Am I just being  nostalgic and seeking for the clock to turn back to a former time?    Is the loss of farmland simply something that has to happen for progress and community growth to happen?  Perhaps the loss of farmland is progress, but what price is being paid for that progress?

This farmland was used to produce crops and livestock that feed us.   Will the loss of farmland mean that someday that the only producer of our food is a large corporation or conglomerate?     Will the future hold the prospects of importing the food we eat like we do the clothing we wear and the textiles we use?      This farmland is also home to wildlife like birds,  deer, rabbits, and creatures.   Where will these creatures of God go?       Do we really want to live in a world where our children can only see crops or livestock in a grocery store or a can, and cannot have the experience to experience the sight and culture of a farm?      These are a few questions that I have, and I suspect there are only the tip of the iceberg of questions that could be raised by church, local, state, and national leaders.    Thanks for reading.   Have a joy-filled day.   -     Randy L. Wall

Prayer-   God, you have created us and all creation.     Give us wisdom as we face the challenges of these days of how to be good stewards of this world you have given;  through Jesus Christ our Lord.   Amen.